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Introduction Many strong-willed women have
secretly wondered if there was something wrong with us, if perhaps we just
weren't trying hard enough to be good conforming Christian women. Cynthia
Tobias provides a compelling and practical way to come together and
identify each other to ourselves and the world. In Christian circles,
we're often a little reluctant to come right out and say we're
strong-willed and proud of it. We've somehow been persuaded that God would
not approve of a woman who is so--well, non-conforming. After all, isn't
the virtuous woman supposed to be quiet, holy and subservient? Cynthia
reminds us that the single most important thing any of us will ever do is
accept Jesus Christ as our personal Savior. But God Himself created and
designed us before we were even born. He gave us our personalities, our
gifts, our learning styles and our individual passions and desires. Chapter One Every woman has opportunities to use some degree of strong will at various times in her life. But for those of us who fit the description of THE STRONG-WILLED WOMAN use our strong will almost as often as we breathe! This chapter gives an overview of what Strong-Willed Women have in common, and points out how easily our best qualities can also become major drawbacks. You’ll love finding yourself in these pages! Chapter Two Strong will and rebellion or defiance are not synonymous! Just because you are strong-willed, doesn’t mean you will automatically be defiant or difficult. This chapter deals with five major myths about the Strong-Willed Woman:
It’s time to clear up some misunderstandings! Chapter Three If you are a strong-willed woman and believe your opposite is someone who is meek, undecided or subservient, think again. My sister has told me several times she considers me the Trail Blazer and herself the Trail Walker. My strong-willed nature encourages me to step out on a limb at a moment’s notice, even if I’m not sure it will bear my weight. My compliant sister stands ready to join me if it works or administer first aid if it doesn’t. She assures me she’s thankful for the Trail Blazers, but if there weren’t Trail Walkers, there’d just be a lot of empty paths. Chapter Four Many single strong-willed women find themselves being pressured by well-meaning family and friends when there appears to be no prospective husband on the horizon---especially if you’re over the age of 25. Here are some suggestions for defending yourself against often ridiculous statements! Whether you stay permanently single or eventually get married, the thing that really matters is your relationship with God, and no one else can control that for you. Chapter Five There’s no doubt that the whole institution of marriage presents one of the greatest challenges of all for strong-willed women everywhere. We’ll take a quick, hard look at why being a happily married strong-willed woman has some very unique aspects! Chapter Six I discovered a disconcerting truth about myself as a parent—I often find myself saying things to my strong-willed child that I never would have responded to positively if I were in his place. In other words, as a strong-willed parent, I can dish it out, but I can’t take it! This chapter will give you lots of ideas for how to hold on to your own strong will and parental authority without destroying your high-spirited offspring. Chapter Seven When we strong-willed women are at our best, any organization would be lucky to have us. We can work tirelessly to accomplish a task, spread enthusiasm among even the most resistant co-workers, and troubleshoot solutions to problems no one else could solve. There are, however, situations that have the potential to bring out the worst in us, and it’s worth taking a look at some of those scenarios that can sabotage our efforts to reflect the best side of our God-given strengths. Chapter Eight Speaking as the “minority” called women, I don’t want standards to be lowered or exceptions to be made in order to accommodate me in the workplace. I don’t want to achieve rank or status based upon an unfair advantage over someone inherently more qualified. I want there to be a clear and solid definition of what needs to be done and if I can do it, I want the chance to prove it. The bottom line is, we should fight to make sure women have the same opportunities as their male counterparts, but if we cannot prove that we can meet or exceed expectations and outcomes, the best person for the job should win. Period. Chapter Nine Why would someone with such a strong will and deeply ingrained streak of independence be so willing to give it all up? As almost any strong-willed woman will tell you, it’s certainly not the threat of eternal damnation that pushed me down to the altar of salvation. It wasn’t lectures from a well-meaning Sunday School teacher or “hell, fire and brimstone” preached by a dynamic traveling evangelist. All those methods can work for some, but what drew me to Christ was much more personal. Who would have thought that by giving up my own will to Christ I would actually be able to accomplish more than I ever dreamed possible? Chapter Ten Even the strongest willed woman has her limits. No matter how hard we try to pretend that nothing can daunt us, the truth is that no one is truly immune to discouragement or depression. As much as we hate to admit it, we are as susceptible to crisis as anyone else. What we do in that crisis, however, can make all the difference in the world. Here’s where we really need our strong will—not to grit our teeth, pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and tough it out, but to place our lives squarely in the care of our Creator, no questions asked. Chapter Eleven We have a very unique perspective for understanding the mind of a headstrong, stubborn, strong-willed girl. Who better to mentor the younger strong-willed generation than us? There’s a familiar saying that states, “You can count the seeds in an apple, but you can’t count how many apples are in the seeds.” I believe every strong-willed person changes the world one way or the other—after all, it isn’t likely the world will change them! What a wonderful opportunity we have to step up and help shape the future of these gifted and spirited young women! The Challenge Are you ready to share this message with other strong-willed women? Can you think of some women in your family, your circle of friends or your workplace who need to hear some encouraging words about their strength of convictions and unrelenting persistence? Buy a copy of this book for them, and watch what happens! So What is In a Nutshell:
It is my sincere desire that this book will validate the Strong-Willed Woman in ways no one but another Strong-Willed Woman could. It is my prayer that the ideas in these pages can be used for outreach, lifting up Christ and drawing even the strongest will back to its Creator. I believe we can make the Strong-Willed Woman feel understood and appreciated and fill her with hope and encouragement. We will know we have succeeded if we can inspire her to continually bring out the best in her own strong-willed nature without ever compromising her relationship with Jesus Christ. --Cynthia Ulrich Tobias
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